top of page

Ballade of Life and Death

I'd like to go to Italy, try Parmesan;
Sample tortillas in Madrid;
I'd like to get a nice suntan,
Go to a lecture, study some Euclid;
Watch motor racing on the Grid;
I'd like to visit Mandalay,
Go hunting Manta Ray and giant squid;
I think that I won't kill myself today.

I'd really like to make a flan
With strawberries; though I couldn't eat it if I did;
For I am looking pale and wan, and even in a caravan
Can't get to children's farm and stroke a kid;
Make music on a dustbin lid;
I'd like to go to Colwyn Bay -
Go fishing with a bloke named Syd;
But still I will not kill myself today.

For I would like to be a Gran;
Although I am an invalid,
Don't want a one-way trip to Switzerland
To do the thing that Church and State forbid,
To be poisoned, suffocated, starved it would be more splendid
Disgracefully to practise growing old and grey
I've discussed it with my egoistic id:
Don't think that I will kill myself today.


Prince, Nazis did it in a van;
To make it voluntarys said to be a better way;
But though I'm loth to wreck your plan
I think I will not kill myself today.

bottom of page